Godzilla, King of the Monsters 1956

Many viewings

This is the best Godzilla. Never get tired of this one, and somehow never remember that Raymond Burr’s character”s name is Steve Martin.

They Came From Beyond Space, 1967

First viewing, Swift Watch party

Never heard of this delightful British “sci-fi” film about aliens possessing earth people to save their race from extinction, and I loved it. They reused sets from a Dalek movie the year before, and it looked like it. The goofy parts of this movie were endearing without being embarrassing. A good watch. The Signal-Watch was present and also has words

Fatty and Mabel’s Simple Life, 1915

First viewing

First time I’ve seen a whole Fatty Arbuckle short, and one of those silent movies best watched in a dark room after the house has gone to bed. 

I can see why he and Mabel Normand were so popular, they have a lot of personality. Clowns were also very popular at one time. This kind of thing isn’t even funny to me if Curly Howard does it.

For Your Convenience, 1939

First viewing

One of those odd little shorts shown in theaters when you’d get a cartoon, a short or newsreel, a B-picture and a feature for the price of a ticket. This is 1939 when color films were just starting to really get traction.

This one purportedly shows examples of life conveniences. The first one is a makeup artist covering up a black eye. That’s...convenient? The next one shows how a parachute is packed. Super convenient. 

 

The one after that, my favorite, shows a home coffee bean roaster and coffee making apparatus I would love to have. Totally not convenient in any way. 

The next one shows a young woman with body dysmorphic disorder using an exercise machine. Very convenient for people who like to watch young women in swimsuits work out then have bubble baths.

The People That Time Forgot, 1977

First viewing. Mom picked it out while I was scrolling through Prime. She says, Patrick Wayne looked better when he was older. I asked her who he was. She tells me he’s John Wayne’s son, I did not know this. Spend time with your parents, they have knowledge. She also recognized Doug McClure.

Sarah Douglas from Superman plays a normal woman and I almost didn’t recognize her. This film is based on Edgar Rice Burroughs and is set in 1919. An expedition flies over a mountain and into a world of breasty cavewomen, samurai-looking evil guy, and puppet dinosaurs. If that sounds good to you, you will like this movie.

Steel Magnolias, 1989

 First viewing. Thought I’d like a Dolly Parton movie, easy to watch with mom. I’ll never forgive her for going to bed halfway through.

Awful movie full of great actresses. 

Woman On The Run, 1950

Many viewings, including the Castro Theater showing during a Noir City

I picked this one to watch with my mom because of the San Francisco locations and the great story. Did not know that Ann Sheridan wrote most of her snappy dialogue. Love her even more now. Robert Keith was Brian Keith’s father, he was married to Peg Entwistle who famously jumped off the Hollywood sign and killed herself.

Late Night, 2019

First viewing

My dad went out of town for a much needed break from caregiving, and I stepped in to stay with my mom and pretty much eat ice cream til we ran out, make grilled cheese sandwiches, never tell her to take her pills, and watch movies that she goes to bed halfway through. It’s not easy picking a movie to watch with your 83-year-old mother who gets embarrassed when there’s swearing. So I picked Late Night, the Mindy Kaling Emma Thompson film because it seemed nice and it also has John Lithgow who is always great. There was swearing but at least no sex. Mom asked me if it was a regular movie or a made for TV movie. Made for paid TV movie? Made for streaming? Straight to streaming?

I enjoyed it. 

The Late Edwina Black, 1949

 First viewing, at mom and dad’s house on the Big (TV) Screen

Fun watching movies on the Giant TV when I visit my parents. They have a giant tv because my dad is 84 and doesn’t see very well. The chair I sit in when we’re all in the living room does not have the ideal view.

This is one of those low-key, British, stage adaptation mystery-with-a-twist that I find quite often very satisfying. Geraldine Fitzgerald is always a delight. BUT THIS CHAIR.

Ocean’s 8, 2018

 First viewing, on the plane back to Arizona.

I’ve wanted to see this movie since it came out. I knew I would love it and I did. It’s not a perfect movie and was plenty ridiculous at times but I loved it. I love all the people in it except maybe Sandra Bullock, never really liked her much at all. And I hate heist movies, with rare exception.

Fungicide, 2002

First viewing

I watched this movie with riffing by Rifftrax, it is not watchable otherwise. A “scientist” (the filmmaker in his actual parents’ basement) creates a chemical that turns an ingredient for terrible soup into man-sized and hand-sized monsters.

This movie just doesn’t give a shit. 

Smoked Hams, 1934

 First viewing

You may not know this about me but I’m a rabid Three Stooges fan. It took me ten years to tape every Curly episode off of tv, now of course I have the box set. I only had about half of the Shemp episodes because they were later and not as good. So when this early solo Shemp short popped up I was all in.

It was interesting to see him teamed with a female, doing stooge-style things. I'd never heard of Daphne Pollard but she was big in comedy shorts at the time.

The old "use a straight razor that your wife just used to open a can of beans and swipe your face like you're peeling potatoes" gag.

Howard and Pollard have a stage act. It involves the Civil War ( which was the same amount of years past as WWII is today) a cannon and also a running joke about getting a message that General Summer has lost various body parts and that they will keep fighting if it takes all Summer.

They get a producer to hire their act. Also in the same show are two "bakers", who sculpt clay faces and make cracks about their mother-in-laws. Its weird.

At the end Howard and Pollard set off a cannon and it blows up the box where the producer is sitting. That's the smoke part.

Footloose, 1984

 First viewing Signal-Watch watch party

The more popular a mainstream film is the less likely I’ve seen it. So I never saw this. It had a nice bit of story about a man trying to keep kids from getting killed in dumb accidents while partying because it happened to his son.  By using his religious and societal influence to shut down anything perceived to be less than strict behavior then seeing the kids were pretty miserable, he realizes he overstepped his ability to protect them. But this story is overshadowed by a fish-out-of-water story about a gymnast who wants to be able to dance at school. 

The Half-Naked Truth, 1932

 First viewing

I’ve never seen a whole Lupe Velez movie but I’ve known about her suicide for as long as I can remember. Lupe was a real doll.

 This one is about a carny who turns Lupe the hoochie dancer into a Broadway success by nefarious publicity-exploiting means, like bringing a lion up to her fancy hotel room as he passes her off as a Turkish princess.

Also has classic “that guy” from the 1930s, Eugene Pallett. He is introduced as the princess’s “manservant” and the ways they go about not saying “eunuch” are pretty hilarious.

This also might be the youngest I’ve ever seen Frank Morgan and he’s still old. And I swear this small secretary part is prolific extra Bess Flowers though she is uncredited and IMDb has the part under someone else’s name.

The Emergency Case, 1930

First viewing

A man borrows his doctor brother’s car and pretends to be him to avoid a speeding ticket. The officer calls him up to come and look at his sick wife and the non-doctor shows up, wraps the sphygmomanometer around her neck accidentally, and she feels better later.

Weird and not very funny.

Jabberwocky, 1977

Second viewing

This may have been suggested because I watched The Crimson Permanent Assurance recently, so I watched it to make sure it was as bad as I remembered. It was, but I watched it anyway. 

Star Trek IV, 1986

 First viewing, Swift Watch party

The movie came out in 1986, the year I moved to San Francisco. I was 21 years old and a goth rocker who drank a lot of cheap wine and did a lot of LSD. I did not go to mainstream movies. I saw the first Star Trek movie in the theater when I was a teen and fell asleep. I had no interest in seeing a Star Trek movie after that. Not sure how this popped up on my radar but I think I was feeling a little nostalgia for the city I’ve loved and called home for 35 years. 

Well, I adored this movie. I am a big fan of TOS and this movie hit all the right notes for me. The cavernous plethora of plot holes didn’t even bother me. The inaccuracies of the depiction of San Francisco didn’t bother me. I just wish there had been more of the city in it. I really enjoyed this very dumb movie.

How to Keep a Job, 1949

 Third viewing

One of those Coronet shorts popular with riffers. It’s just so dang earnest. Work hard, don’t slack off, show up on time, don’t leave early, don’t smack talk your employer. And show some initiative you little shit.

Early social distancing.

Bashful, 1917

 First viewing

I’ve never seen a Harold Lloyd joynt all the way through, and never one this early. But the man just sparkles. This is a story about a shy boy who needs to pretend to have a wife and baby to get an inheritance. Mild hilarity ensues. Bebe Daniels is adorable as the girl who pretends to be his wife.

Computer, please translate.

Here he is shy and dancing alone, mimicking a dancer in a grass skirt at a party.

Bebe Daniels is one of those new modern girls.

A telegram and a relative arrive.

Bebe Daniels makes this face then everything works out in the end.